Xebec

one of the more common Xebec cards

“The digital version sucks.”

— everybody

Xebec is a collectible trading card game centered around the sea serpent hunting industry.

General Info

Xebec was created by a non-profit of the same name, in an effort to bolster the sea serpent hunting industry. Sea serpent hunting is dangerous and unpredictable, but necessary in protecting shipping and passenger vessels on the open seas. Profits for the sale of cards go towards whaling vessels that hunt sea serpents.

The name “xebec” refers to a vessel not traditionally used for whaling. However, there is already a popular lizard card game titled “Whalers,” and in the midst of the Lizard Apocalypse sailors use whatever ships they can get their hands on. Xebecs are cheaper and faster than galleys, and can you tell I did light Google research to create this webpage? That’s the takeaway. Xebec sounds catchy.

Notable Cards

There are more than 2,000 Xebec cards for play and collection. Here are a few notable cards:

  • HMS Expendable: (shown above) named after a real ship; one of the most common Xebec cards. Its namesake’s captain is severely depressed and a bit careless with his own life. Yet somehow the ship boasts the most kills, and hasn’t lost a single crew member since it launched.

  • Squidney: named for the ecoterrorist and all-around jerk, the giant squid named Squidney, who was slain by the Notary Public at the expense of the ship’s integrity. A rare and powerful card.

  • Zyclops: named after the one-eyed alien adonis of the same name, who holds impromptu small private concerts for people he abducts onto his spaceship. When played, the opponent has to relinquish one hero card from active play for 2 turns. However, when returned to play, the hero is strengthened by two points.

  • Notary Public: originally designed to be a common, well-rounded card for all deck archetypes at all levels of play, a warehouse fire, a riot in Albany, New York, and the curse on the real life ship, only two cards are in existence. One is under tight security, but on display at the Xebec factory museum tour. The other was stolen and its whereabouts are unknown.

  • Governor ßkoolth: when played, brings a previously destroyed ship back into active play. Named after the Governor of the State of New York, who saved the Notary Public from physical/financial ruin.

Popularity and Legacy

The Mesopotamian goddess Ishtar is a casual collector, but a much more avid player. By contrast, Los Angeles socialite (and possible renaissance artist, Michelangelo) undead Vampire Mike doesn’t play, but has an impressive collection at his mansion.

American actor and producer Joe Manganiello hosts Xebec games with other celebrities. He says Xebec is, “not as good as Dungeons & Dragons.”

Non-human Coscto alternative and bastion against Cthulhu Clawsco hosts tournaments at many of its locations, and sells Xebec cards in stores. Clawsco spokesperson and employee, West Virginian cryptid Mothman, is an excellent player, but can’t enter Clawsco tournaments, as an employee.

Xebec Movie

Disney made an animated Xebec movie — before Disney was destroyed during the Lizard Wars. They filled the movie with “quirky” humor, gave it a bubblegum visual design, cast Tom Hanks and Chris Pratt in the lead roles as Italian sailors, and called it a “Disney Pixar” movie. It was bad, but grossed 28.6 billion dollars.